Sometimes in life, you go with the flow. You help where you can, plug in where it makes sense and focus on the needs that seem to be obvious. A few years back, I was going with the flow, in my spare time helping plant churches with my local church. Somehow, I ended up being the default Pastor of one of those churches. 

Throughout that time in my life, to be completely honest, I didn't know if I was saying the right thing, doing the right thing, or representing the  church the right way. However, I always knew Jesus was in the midst. Jesus wove himself throughout everything. Frankly, I felt a calm peace that helped me know that Jesus walked with me. While planting this church, I saw Jesus move in spite of myself. Never was there a better or more moving time than the story of Sam. 

The Church

Our church was a small little campus in downtown Atlanta, Georgia. We resided in the Little 5 Points community. There's no way to describe this community accurately; you just have to feel it. The people are accepting here, loving here, but also hurting here. Much of the hurt comes from a rejection of their inner being, a rejection by the group of people that says they love them and God loves them...a rejection by us. 

We made headway by having no agenda but to love. We found ourselves meeting in an incredible theatre on Sunday mornings. This theatre was, and still is, run by incredible folks. However, they frequently have provocative and socially challenging plays running Friday and Saturday night. The next day was our Sunday services. 

When I first stumbled upon this place, I went with a real pastor to meet the theatre manager. We sat waiting in the coffee shop connected to the theatre, and in bubble letters on the window of the coffee shop was the word "adultery." I remember telling the other pastor, "I am not sure if they promote adultery, or if it's just a drink... but this is where Jesus wants us." This was our home!

Soon enough the theatre manager came and found us and began the tour of the place. He was willing to rent to us, but he thought there could be some issues. He had three:

1. The aforementioned plays (could you believe, he didn't want to be offensive to us!) 
2. There were a few Sundays we just couldn't meet
3. The real issue: he hated churches!  

The other pastor and I knew what he meant by hating churches. We assured him we were here to love and not judge. In fact, we told him "God judges, the Holy Spirit Convicts, We Love." That was our thesis. That was our agenda. That was our path forward. 

"Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God.  Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love."
- 1 John 4:7-8  

It worked, and we started renting the theatre every Sunday. It was during those first few months that I met a homeless man named Sam. 

Dime Bags for Jesus

Sam used to come into our theatre to get warm, get sober and to heckle me on scripture. Sometimes I could handle Sam, and sometimes I wanted to strangle Sam, but as a pastor I thought that would look bad... but then again, I didn't really think I was a real pastor. 

Through the years, we added a Christmas show called "Rock the Cradle, the Night Hope Arrived." This event is where the story of Sam took a turn. I'll never forget setting up for this Rock N Roll Christmas Cantata with my friends Jason Fowler and Will Turpin. In those days, we would arrive early and begin loading in speakers, lights, platforms, Christmas trees, etc to prepare for the show. It was during our second year of the show that Sam showed up early. I mean 4 hours early. 

Sam was soaking wet, had a black eye and smelled of urine and beer. He asked if he could help out. What he meant was, "can you get me a coffee." I thought to myself, "I don't have the time. I have 600 people coming to a show tonight, I am setting up, running around like a chicken with my head cut off, and you come in here with your drunk ole self..." And then, one of the sweetest ladies in our church came over. You know the kind: the one that hugs anyone. Believe me, Sam was one of those radioactive ones that you wouldn't hug. But Gina went right up to Sam and hugged him. She asked him if she could get him a coffee and sat there and prayed with him. 

As I went back to helping, Gina came to me and said Sam wanted to get better. He was ready to give up, and she thought he had hit his rock bottom. In fact, he had even given her his weed and said he was through with it, all of it. She was a bit worried about the weed and asked me what to do with it. I said, "smoke it!"  We laughed, and I told her to throw it away, to which she replied, "but my finger prints are on it." I told her I don't think the police are searching trash cans for finger prints on dime bags!

So I sat with Sam, and we prayed and cried, and I made some phone calls. By the end of the night I had secured a bed in a recovery home run by a friend of mine, Ron. That night after our Christmas show, I took Sam to detox. Sam got sober. 

You should have seen the look in his sober eyes, fully known by his fellow man and fully known by Jesus, but most importantly fully knowing the love of Jesus. There simply wasn't a greater joy for him. Sam was happy in life, happy in a relationship with the one person that changes it all: the one person that says simply "I love you, all of you, good bad and ugly!" The name above all names... Jesus. 

The Struggle in Hope

I wish I could tell you that was the end, that Sam lived happily ever after. But Sam struggled with addiction. While Jesus loves us, Jesus gives us free will. In addition to free will, Jesus tells us that this world is broken, not perfect and will leave us wanting more. Addiction is part of our human brokenness, part of our disease-riddled world here on earth. It's like a magnet to those of us that suffer with hurts, habits and hang ups. If we take our eye off sobriety for one second, addiction can take our lives, even though we know the sweet taste of a sober relationship with Jesus. 

A few years after our Rock the Cradle encounter, Sam called me, drunk, homeless and seemingly at rock bottom again. I called another recovery center, and this time he stayed for only a few months before being kicked out. He bounced around after that episode, with a call here and a call there. Eventually the calls faded. Then just the other day, I got a text: "did you know Sam passed away?"  

I don't know why this world is so tough. I don't know why it is so riddled with problems. Those of you struggling with addiction, please know that there are success stories, and there is hope and support. There is a way forward with accountability for you, here and now. I also want to be clear: your love for Jesus and desire for help is real. It is authentic, and Jesus hears you.  

Thinking back on Sam and knowing how the story ends, I do know where Sam is. I know there is a happily ever after for him. Sometimes healing comes on this side of heaven, and sometimes it is on the other side. Sam knew Jesus, and Jesus knew him. They were friends, and they are still to this day. Sam is whole, Sam is made perfect through Jesus, and Sam is home. I have learned a lot from Sam, but the greatest lesson is the depth of God's Grace.  

"What shall we say about such wonderful things as these? If God is for us, who can ever be against us? Since he did not spare even his own Son but gave him up for us all, won't he also give us everything else? Who dares accuse us whom God has chosen for his own? No one--for God himself has given us right standing with himself. Who then will condemn us? No one--for Christ Jesus died for us and was raised to life for us, and he is sitting in the place of honor at God's right hand, pleading for us.  

Can anything ever separate us from Christ's love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? As the Scriptures say, "For your sake we are killed every day; we are being slaughtered like sheep." No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.

And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God's love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow--not even the powers of hell can separate us from God's love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below--indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord."  
- Romans 8:31-39