For the past 2 years, I've been in a season of tremendous stretching! There are two books that I've been reading and meditating on over and over: The Shack and The Ragamuffin Gospel.

At the beginning of 2015, I received a word of wisdom from a mentor of mine; he said "Ryan, the word for 2015 is TRUST." I've discovered that I've lived with a vicious cycle and pattern in my life of wanting to trust, trying to will myself to trust, then falling back into the trap of clenching my prize possession out of fear and ultimately feeling defeated and hopeless.

I'm learning that I will never be able to trust God if I don't believe that He is good! I will never believe that He is good,if I don't ultimately believe that He is always motivated by love. I will only trust God to the degree that I know and perceive him. For many years, I have perceived God as being moody and temperamental. Viewing God this way has sent me down road after road of performance based pursuits; trying to please God and keep on performing so that he'll stay happy with me, and bless me in return. After years of being on this treadmill, I've found myself exhausted and embittered!

I've been raised in the church, and I feel like I'm JUST NOW receiving revelation about God's grace! Learning about his grace is changing my life. Understanding that He is love; that I'm not separated from him, has changed my life! I'm experiencing a freedom that I've never known. I feel like I'm re-learning the good news of the gospel which is that fact that Jesus has already come to us; He's already come into the middle of our storms and messes and says, "I'll walk with you if you let me."

At first, believing the "Freedom in Christ" felt reckless and irresponsible! However, I'm finding a freedom that I've never known, and it's come through arriving at the end of myself, and confessing to the Holy Spirit, "I can't do this! I am incapable of fixing myself! I cannot raise myself upright! Jesus, YOU have to do it!"

I feel like the pressure is off, and I'm just learning to BE and to REST!

I want to encourage you today; instead of exhausting yourself on the treadmill of performance, try crawling up into the lap of Jesus, and let go!

Phillipians 1:6  "And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue his work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns."